How the Fawn Response to Trauma Created a Pathological People-Pleaser

I was an expert at reading the room. I had to be.

I was an expert at reading the room. I had to be.

Photo by Michał Bińkiewicz on Unsplash

I have never in my life believed that I am perfect, but I did seem to think I needed to be perfect. I had to perform perfectly — or else. The “or else” part was an ambiguous but all-encompassing fear. Or else I wouldn’t be loved. Or else I would be rejected. Or else I…